Friday, April 24, 2009

Friday Feminist Fuck You[r delicate sensibilities]

I belong to an internet community of really smart people with big egos, and in that internet community, we discuss all kinds of topics including female health issues. Recently the thread has been active. We've been talking about pap smears and other procedures that prevent cervical cancer, as well as menstruation and endometriosis. So one of the guys on the board comes into the thread and posts a "vomit" emoticon.
This is offensive for two reasons: first, the thread is called "female health issues", but because this man feels a sense of entitlement (not only to all areas of the board, but that everyone is entitled to his opinion) he feels it's not only necessary but acceptable for him to express his displeasure at our discussing our sexual organs as they exist in circumstances that aren't sexy. If you're a woman, you're probably not surprised by this. In fact, you're probably used to it, but that doesn't make it any less offensive.
Secondly, the discussion of the penis occurs throughout our culture (and message board) and is very rarely restricted to one thread on a message board. If the guys on the board wanted to talk about prostate health, it'd go into the general health thread. But not only are the women expected to keep discussion of our anatomy restricted to a single thread, we can't even be respected in that single thread and it becomes necessary for random penis-possessor to barge in on our conversation with a vomit emoticon. (And frankly, there was nothing even remotely graphic in that particular discussion. Certainly nothing vomit-worthy.)
Men pull this kind of shit all the time. The mere mention of a period, (any period, even the grammatical kind) is likely to cause a man to cringe. Posting "Woman issues. Ow." as my status on Facebook got me a "TMI!!!" and admonishment to step away from the crackberry from my boyfriend. Now, he's got more inside information than the average person who keeps up with my Facebook, but still. Yes, everyone knows what I meant by "woman issues", but it's certainly not too much information to post that I'm in pain. Which I am. And it pisses me off. (I won't even go into how "woman issues" only means one thing but "man issues" can mean anthing from health problems related to the male sexual organs to dating drama and daddy issues.)
So, to all those who are offended by my anatomy performing some other function than pleasing you, fuck you and your delicate sensibilities. I bleed. Get over it. And no, I'm not over-reacting cause of hormones. You're being an asshole.


willis said...

Living with my daughter (mid 20's) and my wife of 35 years I don't think of myself as intolerate of anything female and in fact think I'm sensitive to feminist issues. This didn't happen naturally as the girls taught me by example, deeds, conversation, etc. That doesn't mean good natured gender "ribbing" isn't allowed between the three of us. I love your blog and appreciate your post and if I was to disaggree with anything on this one it would be to change "Men" to "some men". I think you meant it that way but someone pissed you off!

Rachel said...

That's true. There are some men who don't act that way and don't go out of their way to make it known that all functions of female anatomy other than the ones that gives them pleasure are gross (and don't write run on sentences like I just did); but even the feminist ones do it sometimes.